God slams fitness jibes
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The OCCC have confirmed that they will break with 110 years of tradition and wear coloured clothing for the forthcoming trip to Sarasota.
The clothes, designed by Armani, will be predominantly navy blue, with orange trim. The cap will be of a colour chosen by Henry Watkinson. Coloured pads etc have been borrowed from a county side. As another concession to the modern game all players will have names on the back of their shirt, although Rick Johnson is threatening to sue after it was revealed that his shirt will bear the legend Dyson!
Another open for endless ridicule is Nick Read, a man who is fir for about three weeks of any year. He has not let the side down this time, pulling a hamstring during last weekend's OCHC match.
When asked, he denied that he was a weak drip. "I pulled my hammy this last time last year before Florida, attempted to pull out of the cricket, was coerced into playing four games (embarrassingly hobbling) by Messrs McDermott and Watkinson, and managed to do more damage such that I did not play hockey again until February, and then pulled it again in first game back as was recommended by physio to take a year off sport to which he said 'bollo** off' (though this may be seen as a blessing to the OC's)."
Stung by suggestions that he would be out until 2001, he thundered, "Unlikely to be fit before Christmas" needs to be differentiated to "being bullied to play 10 overs of cricket by Williamson et al in Florida" to "unlikely to be match fit to play hockey, save ripping the frickin muscle again."
"Puurrlleeaasee! Let's hope I have more joy in pulling things other than muscles in the US. One can only pray." When asked about the possibility of the latter, the consensus of OCCC tourists was that there was more chance of Bailey avoiding another confrontation with The Wall than Reado pulling.
The OCCC have confirmed that they will break with 110 years of tradition and wear coloured clothing for the forthcoming trip to Sarasota.
The clothes, designed by Armani, will be predominantly navy blue, with orange trim. The cap will be of a colour chosen by Henry Watkinson. Coloured pads etc have been borrowed from a county side. As another concession to the modern game all players will have names on the back of their shirt, although Rick Johnson is threatening to sue after it was revealed that his shirt will bear the legend Dyson!
Another open for endless ridicule is Nick Read, a man who is fir for about three weeks of any year. He has not let the side down this time, pulling a hamstring during last weekend's OCHC match.
When asked, he denied that he was a weak drip. "I pulled my hammy this last time last year before Florida, attempted to pull out of the cricket, was coerced into playing four games (embarrassingly hobbling) by Messrs McDermott and Watkinson, and managed to do more damage such that I did not play hockey again until February, and then pulled it again in first game back as was recommended by physio to take a year off sport to which he said 'bollo** off' (though this may be seen as a blessing to the OC's)."
Stung by suggestions that he would be out until 2001, he thundered, "Unlikely to be fit before Christmas" needs to be differentiated to "being bullied to play 10 overs of cricket by Williamson et al in Florida" to "unlikely to be match fit to play hockey, save ripping the frickin muscle again."
"Puurrlleeaasee! Let's hope I have more joy in pulling things other than muscles in the US. One can only pray." When asked about the possibility of the latter, the consensus of OCCC tourists was that there was more chance of Bailey avoiding another confrontation with The Wall than Reado pulling.
Labels: Henry Watkinson, Martin Williamson, Nick Read, Sarasota
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