Sharks avoid the OCs

What the advertisers would have you believe was a once-in-a-lifetime shark-viewing experience was described by Keith Crump as “the worst day of my life”. The 4.30am start unsurprisingly accounted for a few casualties as some senior players opted out with lame excuses, but more than a dozen of the group headed out to sit in a cage and watch sharks at play. Gates’ now customary chunder (some say it was before the boat has left the harbour) failed to prove a tasty treat and not a shark was to be seen in the four-hour bobbing on the ocean waves. And it rained. And it was cold.

The seniors headed for the hills for a long and wine-fuelled lunch, enlivened by the Johnson-Watkinson old wives act as the hapless pair got hopelessly lost (the blame is still being discussed). The wine continued to flow through fines and beyond, with the senior pro (Chetwode) seeking to spark some old hostilities by covering the locals in beer. His wife, by now Dick of the Day, was quieter … mainly because she had passed out, making her an easy target for Copleston to write on as she slept.