Bailey bites the dust

Women throughout southern England have had a wretched few months. First, Rick Johnson finally asked Melissa to marry him - amazingly she accepted - and now it has been revealed that Steve Bailey (Tweedle Dum to Rick's Tweedle Dee) has followed suit and got engaged.

Details are sketchy, but it was on the cards ever since his two closest friends - Rick and Will Bond - succumbed in 2003. Faced with the prospect of being the only single man on tour, he caved in. It is reported that Kitbag popped the question while bobbing around in a Venetian gondola

Reaction among his friends was of delight and relief, although one former schoolmate expressed surprise. "I didn't even know he'd ever had a girlfriend," he explained.